Prayers are being answered :)

So I thought I would give you guys all an update on my health and let you know how things are going for me.

As you know the last time I wrote to you I was going to be going to get my health checked out. I went to a naturopath and I can say that I am so glad I decided to go and see her and find out what she had to say. She is so knowledgeable in what she does and she has made me realize a lot. She has even picked up little things in me that are important to my health. Things like because I lived in Mexico as a child it doesn’t matter how long I have been in Canada…my body is used to a certain amount of sun and because I don’t get that here my body is cold and tired a lot. It makes so much sense to me now because if you ask anyone who knows me I always get super cold in a room that would be warm to everyone else. Also people know that I wear two pairs of socks in the winter to keep my body warm. 😛 I do learn so much from her every time that I go and visit. I have been to her about five times and she has me on some herbs and vitamins and has done some treatments on me every time I go visit her. It is crazy but I am happy to report that I have noticed that the pain is starting to go down. It is SO nice to not have such excruciating pain two weeks out of the month and I have actually been shocked at how much the pain has gone down.

I still have had nausea and have other issues in my body going on but she is trying to help them as well. I have been so used to doctors just handing me prescriptions, making me feel like I was crazy and not really trying to help me but I can tell she is totally opposite and wants me to get better. She also just doesn’t want my pain to be less she wants it completely gone. It is so awesome to have someone like that helping you.

Thank you all for praying for me through this process! I can’t help but think that the pains are also going down because of your prayers to the greatest healer of all. 🙂

The other answer to prayer that I have to share is that last time I wrote to you all I mentioned how a Mom of a girl I was helping got jealous and wouldn’t let me go out with her daughter anymore. Well I am so happy to report that the Mom had a change in her heart I am now able to go out with this girl and continue to try to help her. God is great!

Travis and I continue to be happily married. I can’t tell you how blessed I have felt by him. I never really understood the whole loving them more and more every day once your married but…I really do keep falling in love more with this man God has put into my life and I grasp a little more of God’s love for me through this. This weekend it hit me again that how much Travis loves me doesn’t compare to the way that God loves me. Travis gave me a beautiful ring when he proposed to me but God gave me the cross and that is something that no one can beat.

We continue to work together in ministry and right now are busy getting everything ready for a coffee house we have coming up on December 4th with our Nexus Young Adult team. Please pray that above all people would be encouraged there and that unity would be felt at this event.

Doors Open and Doors Close

I heard a message on the radio one day and it was speaking about ‘plans’ and how sometimes we have them and we think they are God’s too but sometimes they turn out not to be. The day after I heard this message I had some doors close and was thankful that I had heard that message on the radio. Just because I had a plan and thought it was going to all work out does not mean it is God’s and so I have to be obedient and understand there is a reason when doors close suddenly.

As you know I had gotten connections to go and speak at high schools in the York Region. I was sent the application you have to fill out to be able to start going in and was told that there were some things on the application that might have changed so if I had any questions to ask. As I looked over the application everything looked good except that I saw that in the requirements it said you had to be 25 or under. I was a little surprised and so wrote the person I was in contact with and asked her if that was something they still required. To my shock I got a quick email saying “Yes, we do have an age limit of 25…..thank you for your interest in the program and all the best in your work in the community.” I couldn’t believe the response and was a bit shocked to receive it but maybe there is a reason why I am not to go with that organization and speak in schools. I do not believe that is the end of going and speaking to teens but I have to accept that this door has been closed for now.

There are still great things that are happening.  🙂 About a month ago Travis and I started a small study and we meet at our house bi-weekly. The first couple of times we had dinners and played games so that the group could get to know each other more. Last Thursday the group decided they wanted to have a Thanksgiving dinner so everybody brought some food and it was a delicious meal. We said what we were thankful for this year and then we started our actual study on the book called “Crazy Love”. We have already got good feedback on the book and some have told us that it is so good they can not put it down. We have had some great moments sharing our thoughts and at the end of the nights we have had some great times praying together. I am very thankful for the group we have. I hope that this group will continue to be open with each other and that they will continue to learn so much about Jesus and his amazing magnitude.

As you also know on August 29th I spoke to the junior youth at my church. Thank you for praying for me as I prepared this message! I was nervous about what I should and shouldn’t say but I really felt the prayers and in the end I think I said exactly what I needed to say. After I spoke I had a girl who is not a Christian share with me how she could relate to so much I said that day. After that day I went out with her and she opened up with me and shared so much of what has gone on in her life and what continues to go on. She is 13 but has already been involved in things that bring darkness into her life. Not only that but she is young and has already tried to hang herself. It is so sad! Things were going awesome with this girl. I loved going out with her and chatting with her regularly. I also loved giving her hope and sharing with her about Jesus but all of a sudden I found out last week that I can not see her anymore. :S Her Mom realized she was going out with me and that she was sharing things with me that she would not share with her Mom. Her Mom got jealous that she was talking to me more then her and so she told her she did not want her to go out with me or talk to me anymore. Please pray for this girl. I will not go against what her Mom said and I will respect that but this girl needs someone to talk to. Please pray that the Mom will not be threatened by me and she will allow her to talk to me again or that someone else can speak into her life and help her with all that she is dealing with.

The other big thing I am working on right now is the process of publishing a book. I have been in touch with others who have written books and I am just trying to see what the next step is for me and what the best thing is for me to do. I have also tried to write different people to make sure that I have the rights to add things in my book that they have said. For instance I talk in one chapter on how the book “Captivating” has impacted my life and so I asked John and Stasi Eldredge if they were okay with me mentioning their book and I did hear back from them last and they said it was fine. They even thanked me for getting the message out there so that was pretty neat. My Dad has some connections with publishers too and so he has been awesome at finding out information for me. I feel like I have gave it my best in writing this book and so I want to make sure that I look into everything as much as I can before I just go ahead and sign one contract without looking into options. God knows what exactly is going to happen with the book and what publishing company I will go with so I am not worried. I know just like everything else that in His time things will come together.

Grace

Tomorrow is Canadian Thanksgiving and so today at church we sang “Amazing Grace” to give thanks to God for saving us. What really hit me today in the song was this line ” How precious did that grace appear the hour I first believed.”

Isn’t it crazy and so true? I think of my life and think how I walked away from God for awhile and how I lived years not wanting to have anything to do with him and then as soon as I realized the truth and asked God to forgive me he forgave me instantly. God did not sit there and think. “hmm let me think can I forgive her for all she has done? Has she done too much to not be forgiven? Is there a reason I shouldn’t forgive her?” No my God died for me on the cross. He paid for my sins when he went through unimaginable pain and shed his blood on the cross. He knew before I did that I would turn from Him but….He was always there waiting for me to come back to Him. So in that moment in that “hour I first believed” he forgave me right then and there. He didn’t care what I had done in the past and in that instant I was made new. He extended that amazing grace to me and I was made white as snow.

“Amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me I once was lost but now am found was blind but now I see. My chains are gone I’ve been set free my God, my Savior has ransomed me and like a flood His mercy reigns unending love, amazing grace”  CHRIS TOMLIN

Casting Crowns Concert 2010

Saturday night Travis and I had the chance to go and see Casting Crowns. We actually weren’t planning on it but the night before the concert we were given the tickets. 🙂 You would think after seeing them perform three times that I would be tired of their songs and their concerts but I don’t know if I could ever get tired of them. 😛

First off there is nothing like listening live to the song live that God used to change my life forever. I always feel Jesus touch when I hear “Voice of Truth”. 🙂 Travis and I were also really touched by a couple of their songs individually but we were also both touched by one song that made us look at our lives and make some changes this past weekend.

Now I have to go back to three weeks ago when my mentor came over and we talked about life as we usually do and I shared with her things that I had seen going on within the Christian circle. I was open and shared with her how I was tired of seeing Christians act a certain way and was tired of hearing Christians talk a certain way when we are supposed to be different from the world and we are supposed to be the light that draws people in. Ephesisans 5:8 says “For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light.”

So why for instance is there so much sexual joking going on within the Christian community? In the New International Version Ephesians 5:4 says “Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.” If you look it up in the Message Bible it says, “Don’t talk dirty or silly. That kind of talk doesn’t fit our style. Thanksgiving is our dialect.” Do those verses not apply the same as any other verse in the Bible? Of course they do!

Then this past Saturday when Travis and I were at the concert they sang the song “Slow Fade”. I have always liked that song but it all of a sudden hit me in a different way as I really listened closely to the words.

“It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away. It’s a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray. Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid when you give yourself away. People never crumble in a day. It’s a slow fade, it’s a slow fade.”

From my past I know far too well how it is a “slow fade” and before you know it you can be in a sin that you never thought you would be in. I know from my past that we do have to stand strong and be careful with what we are taking in and what we are doing in our lives that could bring us down. For example we can watch certain shows, and listen to non-Christian songs and before you know it you are taking in all this garbage that is actually bringing you down. We can become desensitized to what we watch and listen to so easily. 

So as I was listening to this song I had to look at my own life and think of the verse in Matthew 7: 3 “ Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye, when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”  It is easy for me to say “I am tired of seeing or hearing….” but what am I doing in my life to be different too? What things can I change in my life to not become that way and to live my life fully for God? I don’t want to become one of those people that just becomes okay with things that are going on around me and I definitely don’t want to become one of those people that starts doing what others are doing because they think it is okay. I want to stand out and I want to be different because that is what I believe God calls us to do.

On the way home from the concert I shared with Travis what I had felt and he totally agreed with me. One thing we knew we should think about was the shows we watch. Right there we listed different TV shows that we normally watch together and decided there are just certain shows we will not watch anymore. We analyzed them and decided if they were healthy for us or not and then if we realized they weren’t we agreed that we would not watch them anymore.

We have had a great month of marriage and we want to do everything to keep that going. We want to be strong as individuals but we want to be strong in our marriage too. We don’t want “black and white to turn to grey” and we want to continue to be examples to those around us.

I love it when God speaks to me! On Friday at youth the Youth Pastor challenged the youth to write peoples names down and pray for them to have more passion, hope, light and to know that God is the truth and the way. The youth leaders did the list as well and when it came to passion I prayed for others but I also prayed for Travis and I because I never want to stop pursuing to have more passion for Christ and now that I am married I want Travis and I as a couple to learn together and continue to want that passion together. I know there is so much more that we have to learn but I am thankful that the day after I prayed for more passion for Travis and I…that God answered my prayers.

I’m Married!!

 On July 17th I made vows in front of God, my family and friends to stay by Travis’ side in sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow and in the good times and the bad. I promised to love him without reservation, comfort him in times of distress, encourage him to achieve his goals, laugh with him and cry with him, grow with him in mind and spirit, always be open and honest with him and cherish him for as long as we both shall live.

God blessed us with an incredibly gorgeous day and our ceremony was everything we wanted it to be and more. Everyone who was involved did an amazing job at making our day so special. From the words the pastors said to the beautiful blessing that was poured over us…our day was wonderful! 

The day definitely flew by and before I knew it all those months of planning and organizing our special day was behind. It really is crazy how much work goes into a wedding but in the end I found it all worthwhile. Though I have not had the time to change my name I consider myself Mrs. Gosselin and now my life begins with a husband by my side.

Travis and I took off to Mexico for our honeymoon and stayed down in the Maya Riviera. It was a wonderful week where we could relax after such a busy time. We did take advantage and spent two days doing excursions. We went on ATVs through the jungles, went zip lining over lagoons with crocodiles, got to hold snakes, went swimming in under water caves, went snorkeling and went to Mayan Ruins. It was such an adventure and it was so much fun to do it together and to create new memories together. We were blessed to be able to do all we did!

Now we are back home and getting back into our routines. I love that I never have to say good bye to Travis at night and that we are able to live in the same place now. I love the times that we have already had and know there will be so many more great times together. I know this is just the beginning and it is so exciting. It is fun cooking together and organizing our house together. It still seems weird to think it is ours but it is. 🙂

I am so incredibly happy right now!!! Travis has been such a romantic and amazing husband to me. I feel so blessed to have him in my life and I am so incredibly blessed to know that he is the one that I get to share my days with now. It is one of those happy feelings you just can’t really describe. 

Though my life is full of great things right now I do not forget what my life was once like and how I once was filled with so much hurt and confusion. I do not remember it to hold on to past things of my life but to remind myself that there are many out there that are filled with pain and that need to have some hope in their lives. I remember to remind myself that God is not done with me yet and that He is still using me and wants to continue using me to touch others. Yes I am married now but that does not change who I am or how I want to help others.

So what is next for me and how can you help me?

I have been asked to speak to the junior youth at my church and share my testimony on August 29th. I would ask you to please pray for me as I prepare this. I know it is my testimony and it should be easy to share but this is my first time speaking to youth that young and I want to make sure that I use words and share my story in a way that is going to impact a younger crowd.

As well Travis and I continue to be busy with Nexus.  Right now we are focusing on building a young adults group within our church. We want to plan a couple of events where we see who the core group is and then from there we want to start a study in the fall that will be held at our place every other week. Pray for us that we really will reach to those young adults in the church that we may have not even seen before. Our church is growing and that is awesome to see but it is hard to not miss people and I just hope that we aren’t missing any one who really needs a group to connect to. We know that with school beginning again it means that there will be new young adults that will be moving to the area so please pray that we will reach those young adults as well.

Now that the wedding is over it is time to start looking into publishing my book. It is still kind of scary to think of publishing my book because I know there are risks involved in publishing it but I know this is what I have to do so please pray for me that I would have a peace about it and that everything involved in publishing a book would go smoothly.

Thank you for reading this long message and for being willing to be a part of my life. Thank you to those of you who continue to believe in me and who continue to support me through prayer or financially, both are so very important. There is a lot that money can do but there is so much power in prayer.

The Blessings Continue

Travis right now lives in a really cute one bedroom apartment. It has a kitchen, bathroom and everything you would need in a place, but the apartment is just a little too small for two people to live in.

Our friends have been living in a beautiful two bedroom apartment for over 10 years. This has been a place that I have gone and stayed at when they needed someone to house and dog sit for them. It has also been a place where I found safety when I went through a really hard time of my life.  Not only that, but my Great Grandpa and after he passed away, my Great Uncle lived behind this place and so it is a neighborhood I know really well.

This year our friends found a house that they fell in love with and so they decided to buy it. They knew that we were looking around for a bigger place and they knew it would be nice for us to have more room, so they told us to contact the landlord and let him know that we were interested.  We did contact the landlord and sat down with him a couple times and discussed things.

In the end it turned out the landlord liked us and trusted us and offered us the place. Of course it helped that our friends highly recommended us.  The landlord gave us an amazing deal that we know we would not get anywhere else and he has been so flexible at understanding our situation of having to wait till Travis’ lease is over.

The two things we knew we would have to get if we moved there were a washer and a dryer because the place did not come with them. We knew we would have to get stackable ones too because that is all that would fit in the laundry room in the new apartment. Travis looked at some in Sears and priced them. We knew it would be expensive, but we also knew it was something we had to get right away.

Then the new landlord called and shared with us that he knew a couple that were renovating their place and were getting rid of their stackable washer and dryer. They were looking to give them away to someone to bless them and heard about us and wanted to know if we wanted them. 

We went and looked at them and realized they were still in good shape, so we decided to take them. We were shocked! We couldn’t believe they did not want any money when the washer and dryer were still in good shape. We knew we were being blessed.

It is so awesome how good God has been to Travis and I! Not only is this place going to be perfect for us, but it is nice and open and so we will be able to have people over. We have thought about maybe holding a study there instead of at the church we go too, but we shall see what God has planned. The sweet thing is if we want to do that we do have lots of room to have that option. As I said before God is good!!!

Though this letter is not about what has been going on in my ministry I wanted to share this with you and show you all how God has been blessing Travis and I. The blessings have been incredible and I know that so much more is in store.

I’ll leave you all with a verse that I believe reflects what has been happening in my life lately. It comes from The Message Bible. 

“Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.” Romans 8:26-28

“Love Is A Beautiful Thing That Brings Together People”

‘Nexus’ is a young adults group I have been involved with since 2008. Our vision has always been to strengthen the body of Christ, encourage each other in our personal walks with Jesus and have a positive effect on our community.

In the past we have tried to hold bi monthly events which are usually coffee houses and then in the summer time we have held Volleyball and Ultimate Frisbee events. It has been neat to see what God has done through this group. We have been able to witness lives being saved through it and that is always such a blessing to be able to witness.

About three months ago the Nexus team received an email from a young adult pastor in the area named Kevin Mast. He shared with us how he was very interested in what we had been doing in the Barrie area. He said he had the same vision as us and was interested in working on a coffee house together.

It was so awesome for Travis and I to meet with Kevin and hear his heart and to see that someone actually really understood what Nexus was doing and was willing to work with us.

On May 1st we had the Spring Perk Coffee House and it was a huge success! Over 100 young adults showed up and it was a night full of fun and new friendships. There were interactive games where people could go up to each other and ask questions and then there were trivia games or games where there were teams of girls vs. guys.

We also had different talented musicians play while the crowd mingled and they did an awesome job!

Near the end of the night there was also a time where everyone got serious and spent some time worshipping God. Kevin Mast, who runs the young adults at the church we hosted it at, shared a message on unity and then a special guest ended the night with a song on unity. It was a perfect way to end the night!

The feed back has been great! Many people said they enjoyed the night and were thankful to Centred and Nexus for putting it on. Some have expressed that they really would like to have something more regular were young adults can connect more and this has been awesome to hear. It is neat that young adults have a passion to do this and they realize this is a way of building God’s kingdom.

A couple weeks ago Travis and I sat down with Kevin Mast again and we are now super excited to be planning a worship night together. I really do believe that there was a bigger picture in Kevin contacting us and I am so excited for new things to come.

Please pray for us as we try to finalize a date that works for us all and we plan all the details that need to be taken care of. Pray that the worship night would go as well as the coffee house and that so many more young adults around the area would unite.

“I’ve Seen Miracles Just Happen”

Last week my Mom was on her way back from taking my Dad to the airport when she was involved in a horrible accident.

We are not sure what exactly happened. Mom says she was feeling very tired but we also think that she blacked out. She doesn’t seem to remember the accident at all until she woke up in the ditch. However, witnesses say she went across into the other lane and hit a transport truck. Witnesses also said it looked like she was trying to go under the truck and somehow she managed to blow out three tires along the side of the truck. She ended up in a ditch and the van is totalled. Everyone that saw the accident and the van said they are so surprised Mom is living. Even when we went to go get things out of the van, the tow man said he still couldn’t believe she was living.

I got the call that she had been in an accident last Thursday afternoon. When I got to the accident and saw the car I realized how bad it was. I am sure my face was white when I saw the car and realized she could have died in the accident. The cop even asked me if I was ok because of how shocked I was. It was so hard to see Mom shaken up and bleeding all over but…I was so glad it was not any worse and that God had protected her. We all know it is a complete miracle that she is still here!

Travis left work and came and met us at the scene and then we went to the hospital with Mom. They did x-rays on her and we thank God that her hip is still in place and the accident did not affect that at all. They flushed out her ear to get all the glass out and she did break a bone in her foot, but other then that she is fine. 🙂

When I got a hold of Dad, who was on his way to Brazil, he told me he was changing his plans and would be on his way home. When he arrived home he just held Mom and cried. He knows home is where he needs to be right now and will be here until next week sometime to help with everything they need to deal with.

I thank God that no one else was badly injured. I believe God protected those that were around her too. We know the transport truck driver went to the hospital but we have not heard anymore about it so we are believing that he had no major injuries. Another car was hit with the debris but no one was hurt.

It is hard to think that Mom was sleeping through the whole accident. If you saw where the accident started to where it ended, and if you heard what they said actually happened, there is no way that Mom could have been sleeping for that long and that the impact and noise couldn’t have woken her up. Maybe it was the pills that she has been taking for her hip. We are not really sure but today she has an appointment to see her doctor to see if there is anything we should be concerned about.

We know she is blessed to be alive and Mom definitely knows it was the hand of God that protected her and it is because of Him that she is here today. She may be walking in an air boot, she may have scrapes and bruises on her but she is alive and doing well. 🙂

My whole family praises God for this!

What The Cross Means To Me

The cross means love to me. It shows me there is someone who pursues me and loves me in a way that no one ever has or ever could. It shows me that there was someone who loved me so much they chose to come down to this earth and surrender their life for me. This is a love that makes me feel complete. 

The cross means grace to me. It shows me that no matter what I have done in my life it is the past and I am now brand new. The chains that were on me before are gone and I can have joy in my life because I am now completely forgiven. 

The cross means hope to me. No matter what I may go through in my life I know I will always have a victorious outcome because the cross shows me there is someone who will never leave my side. Christ gave me hope when he shed his blood for me and now I can always have a light that keeps me going, no matter how hard life gets. 

I would not have been saved from the deep dark pit I was in if it were not for the cross and because of the love, grace and hope that I have now in my life, the cross means everything to me. The cross is so special to me and I am absolutely blessed by it. It is and always will be the greatest gift that I could ever receive for it assures me that I have ever lasting life and that one day I will stand beside my Jesus and live with him forever.

Scary Incident

During the Christmas holidays I had a bit of a scare. Just before Christmas Travis got this tiny little blood blister on his back. Then one weekend it popped and we thought that was the end of it but then a mole appeared in the spot the blood blister was. The weeks following the mole got bigger and it started bleeding. I looked up on line what it meant if a mole started bleeding and it said we should go get it checked out right away so we did.

We went to a walk in clinic and the doctor said Travis was too young to have cancer and that he would give us a referral to a dermatologist and to just keep the mole bandaged. 

It kept bleeding off and on for a couple weeks but then over New Years this mole started growing every day and it started bleeding constantly. The little bandages that he had been putting on his back got too small and so he had to buy the biggest bandages that stores sold. His bleeding was so bad that it would constantly be going through his shirts and he would wake up with blood on his bed every morning. 

Then one day he called me and told me he was bleeding so much he had to go to the ER. I met him there and he got in pretty quickly. They checked it out and said that they could not cut it off because they wanted the dermatologist to see it and he would probably want to send it away. 

This news freaked me out. I had gotten a couple people to pray for him and his back. I knew that God was in control of Travis life and I was trying not to worry but it was so hard for me to not think of the worst and wonder if this mole meant something really bad. I hated seeing him bleed all the time and it hurt me to see him get frustrated when he would bleed through his shirts in public. 

The doctor at the ER told us to call the dermatologist office and ask if we could get in sooner. I had people praying that we would be able to get in right away and sure enough our prayers were answered and when Travis called they said he could go in the next day. 

We went to the appointment and it ended up being good news. Turns out Travis had a thing called Pyogenic Granuloma. They aren’t really sure how they develop but it is a skin growth. It was so nice to see colour come back to Travis face when the doctor told us what it was and as we walked out Travis said excitedly, “only one more day.” 🙂

The next day Travis was scheduled for a small surgery and he got it removed. I saw them take it off and scrape a bit of his skin to send it away for testing but we are believing it will all come back positive. 

I am thankful that God answered our prayers and the doors opened up for him to get it removed quickly. I am also so thankful that it ended up not being anything serious and that now that is something we do not have to worry about. 

My mentor made me realize something the other day when she wrote me this. “God’s timing on things is always so interesting, isn’t it?  You could have been in Africa when this happened or right before the wedding.” I realize this is so true! I would have been so concerned if I had been in Africa and didn’t really know what was going on and couldn’t be there for Travis and I know it would have been just another worry if it had happened before our wedding. Everything is God’s perfect timing!